My assistant brought her 7-year-old son to work with her today. Apparently his school has some sort of teacher development day and she had nowhere to leave him. Which is perfectly fine with me. Heck, much of the work my assistant does can be done by a 7-year-old anyway, so really it's just like an extra pair of hands. (I don't at all mean to imply my assistant only has the capabilities of a seven-year-old -- that's not true at all, she's quite excellent actually; just that most of the tasks I need her to do -- answering the phone, making copies, picking up my dry cleaning -- those are things most intelligent 7-year-olds can probably handle.) In any event, I figured I'd try and make the day fun for him. I've got a document review to hand out to an associate that's pretty easy -- I just need all of the e-mails pulled from a box of assorted papers. So I gave it to the kid. He finds it thrilling, his mom appreciates it, and, frankly, he'll probably do a better job than most of the associates will, since they'll spend the morning cursing me under their breath, wearing their headphones, and getting distracted from the task by the latest Linkin Park CD (yes, I listen to the radio occasionally). It makes me think: maybe we should hire some 7-year-olds to replace some of our associates. They certainly work cheaper, they'll find the work more challenging and rewarding, and, best of all, they'd rather have a Kids Meal from McDonalds than a fancy lunch at Wolfgang Puck's latest restaurant -- and so they'll save the summer program a heck of a lot of money. It's this kind of thinking outside the box that's important for my job. As long as this kid doesn't vomit on the documents. I hate when kids vomit. Vomiting should just be for nervous associates asked to do their first deposition or called into the office for a good old tongue-lashing. I haven't made anyone vomit in a while. Maybe it's time to do some performance reviews.

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